My boyfriend is upset that i don't want to change jobs. He works harder + makes more. But I am a fulltime?

student and he knew that I was not going to get into any serious job.He thinks that just b/c he has more of a carrer oriented job that I should as well.He is 26 I am 21 if that makes a difference.We are both students and he thinks that just because he works f/t and school p/t so should I.But he knew in the beginning that I want to go to school f/t and wrk p/t. Since we have moved out of state things have gotten worse b/c now he knows I have no one to run to if we have an argument. I want to come back home but I am unsure if I should just find a job that keeps ne busy.That is the argument w/ him,he wants me to find a job that keeps me busy even if it does pay less than my current.i like my job,it is flexible and my manager lets me do homewrk.we have had arguments about this before because he brings up how he is the breadwinner and i should apreicate him more for affording me to go to school and live a better life.i want to go back to my home state, but am i making a mistake?My boyfriend is upset that i don't want to change jobs. He works harder + makes more. But I am a fulltime?
No you are not making a mistake. If you told your bf this from beginning, he's not being to considerate. I know in Washington, the cost of living is high. If it is hard on him to do what he agreed to, then make it easy for him. You want this relationship to last without a major fall down. I say go ahead and leave Washington. Why stress you out and him, making the both of you miserable. Be happy! Who cares who has the most money. He suppose to attempt to take care of you. I mean you moved out of the state for him, I guess.



School should be your main goal at this point, that is enough stress and crap to go through. I know! Plus you have a p/t job. Go ahead and leave, If he wants to act like a man. Then he should stick to his verbal contract and respect the situation as is.My boyfriend is upset that i don't want to change jobs. He works harder + makes more. But I am a fulltime?
I think that would be the right thing to do. He doesn't support you and worse he is trying to control you by changing you. Leave him now. It will get worse, not better. Are you happy? It doesn't sound like it. Don't you want more? Tell him to take a hike and find an uneducated woman that will put up with him. He's 26. You are 21. He's 5 years older. He should be done with school by now unless he's working on a masters. You need to do what you think is best but I really think it would not be a mistake to leave him. You are so young and you should do what you feel is right for you. If you don't then you will be unhappy and become resentful and maybe even bitter.
Next he'll be telling you what to do with your money and time and then he'll want you to quit the job and stop going to school then he'll graduate and you'll see his rear disappearing out the door with some other woman. Go home and hope that your family will help you finish school and get a job and pay them back as soon as you can.
I have had a similer issue I have a degree in art and I only work part time to give me the time to make my work. My ex thought I should just get a ';real'; job that brings in the bacon but even if I have got a full time job in a shop or whatever I'd have still earned a lot less than him as he was an engineer. In the end I broke up with him. Like your boyfriend he had issues with being appreciated. I think a lot of guys feel paranoid that women are just freeloading off them when in reality if you are together and love each other then in should be a real partnership. Now my art career is starting to take off and soon I will be able to give up my other job and I'll be both happy and have plenty of money coming in. If my ex had been more supportive he could have shared in my good fortune.

Speak to your partner and see if you can work things out but if not then don't let him hold you back.
I think that you need to let him know that you are doing the school thing for you and you told him that in the beginning. You are young and it is completely fine to be in school and working part time. Especially with the job that you have, which sounds really amazing for a student; being able to to your homework and have flexible hours. I would tell him how you feel and how the things he is saying are making you feel. He is a lot older than you and the fact that he is doing the opposite is fine, he needs to accept the situation or both of you need to discuss openly what needs to change.
From your description, he's being extremely shortsighted to the point of stupidity. Is this a means of control on his part? That is, would he criticize ANYTHING you were doing? Whatever the motivation, he needs to learn these things are partnerships and what benefits you in the long run, benefits your partner in the long run. If he cannot learn the lesson, do NOT let that keep you from doing what is in your best interests.
It's funny... my Girlfriend and I have similar kinds of arguements! Actually I decided to take some time apart from her as a result.



It's been great because it's given me time to think about our situation and I don't know but what I've been thinking probabl applies to you as well.



Both of you need to make some sort of compromise for eachother. The fact that you are working as well as studying sounds to me like you've been compromising... but is he?



Don't jump the gun and just dump him... I tried for 4 years with my girlfriend before I decided to end it. You do need to talk... try not to get into a petty arguement.



At the end of the day you are investing in your future whilst studying... You should hopefully come out with a better job. It's worth trying to explain this to him (I don't know if you have already tried).



If you both are not happy then you need to both ask yourselves why you're togther.



Perhaps going back home might be better for the both of you... at least for a while.



First try sitting down and talking . It sounds to be like he just needs to feel a bit more appreciated in general... he can't put his finger on what's really bothering him so he's finding any excuse to have a go at you and the easiest one is about your job. People rarely say what they mean you know.



I honestly know how hard it is and I hope things work out for you I really do... I'm in the same boat as you myself just a little further down the line.
Hun you need to leave. If he is treating you this way and you are not married then can you imagine what will happen when you truley are his? These are the warning signs of someone who wants to be in control and have their way. If you can not communicate with him on how important u working this job is and he can not reasonably explain his concerns then its time to move on....I understand finances are stressfull but I have 5 kids and have no gone back to school my husband knows how important this is to me instead of bugging me and buggin me about going back to work after losing my job he sees that I have cut back on a lot things and helped ease our budget by using coupons only driving when necessary, painting my own toe nails, dying my own hair, cutting the kids hair, only renting movies instead of going out, making cookies instead of buying store bought...he appreciates the little things that are adding up..now if you have done some this and tried to communicate to him how important it is to you to finish school and he still doesnt listen ( if ur not married) then go home hun its time to pack it up and find your way thru life...take a deep breath tell yourself you are worth it and you can do it and just get up off the couch and do it.
i think he's just being a jerk. maybe he's seeing someone else and wants you to be out of the house more often. if he knew from the begining what you wanted what other reason does he have of bringing this up? He's just being bigheaded because he knows he earns more than you and you depend on him. he really doesnt deserve you and you should think pf other alternatives.
Do you really want someone that treats you that way? He's a selfish, immature, controlling male.



Go back home and leave his stupid azz sitting there.